Faith In Birth

Wow, what seems like a stress is gone in the flash of an instant and life moves on doesn't it.

We had a bizarre Christmas. Ethan knocked out his 3 front teeth Christmas day only after Harrison and Emma both had the stomach flu that morning. My house is a mess, my kids toys are all over the place, and what can you do?

Anyway, I wanted to note some of my thoughts I have been having of late from reading the scriptures. I am in 1 Ne. and I just read the part where the women had children in the wilderness.

I think of my own experience and try to apply it to what it would have been like to be in the wilderness for them. Their norm in birth was not as ours is. They were used to experiencing birth as it is - not as some medical event, but the real thing. They knew, or at least I suspect they knew, of how to be more comfortable with cushions, water, support, etc. They knew how to facilitate and alleviate with compassion. I also assume they knew the kinds of foods a mother-to-be should eat to be strong and have strong offspring. These knowledges were known and have been lost as it were in our modern day reliance upon technology, "fast" foods, and conveniences. They worked hard because that was daily life. Yes, they might have had servants to do washing and cooking and such, so that burden may have also weighed them down. But, I don't believe it was for them what it would be like for the majority of women today to have to "toil" or work in the wilderness.

I bet they got fatigued during early pregnancy. I bet their joints ached during the night. I bet they were hungry more often and for more food - which we know they had very limited supply of many times. I am sure they had times they longed for a soft bed to sleep in and they wished they could sit down and put their feet up and have a drink of something or other they missed. But, as Nephi testified - they learned to bear these things with strength and non-murmering. Non-murmuring for me includes gladness, so they must have found joy in their strength.

Laman and Lemuel, on the other hand, were prone to complaint. They were quick to find fault and appeal to how difficult they had it that they claimed it would have been better for their women to have died than to have to bear those hardships. They saw, and I am sure heard and clung to, the complaints of sore joints, fatigue, heartburn, insomnia, hunger, and their birthing sounds and it only made them more sure in their determination that it was so horrible.

It reminds me of my approach to birth vs. the mainstream mother. We are both doing a task that is noble, and the crown of our creation. But, I choose to see the joy, feel the beauty, and experience the full ups and downs of pregnancy and birthing and cherish that. I choose to be full of feeling so as to appreciate the joys because of the lows. I choose to let myself glory in the mode of birth, in the divinly appointed way we bear children. I choose to give the glory to the Lord as I rely on Him as His babies are born through me.

Now, I don't want that to sound like I am bragging. I am not. I am so honored that the Lord has seen fit to allow me these choice experiences. I am humbled that I get to participate and I do not want it belittled, downplayed, or taken from me in any way or by any one. I am referring in that last sentance to how birth is managed in today's mainstream setting. One of drugs, equipment, staff, sterile locations, isolation from supportive caregivers, and a general lack of knowledge of the midwifery skills that bring compassion, strength, confidence, and if I may be so bold as to say, the spirit back into birthing. Actually, the spirit is there, and midwifery works in a way as to be conducive of that spirit. Contrasting that to the hospital setting, the machines, the drugs, the "Experts" (doctors) take the main focus and actually overrides the stirrings of the spirit that make the experience horrendous for many women.

I spoke to a woman today in church who asked me about my childbirth education and doula work. She described herself as a pansy and even confessed that she won't have more children because her doctor retired and she is afraid she wouldn't be able to find someone to induce her and give her an epidural early. Little does she know that there are tons and tons of doctors who would be glad to give that to her and that is how the practice as a rule. But, what struck me the most is that her confidence in herself as a birthing woman was next to none, and she admitted that she knew she was missing the Spiritual side of birth by relying on drugs and medicine to manage her birth. She did not experience that in any of her 3 births, knew she had missed out on that, but was not willing to do the work to be able to gain it.

I believe that is why we, and possibly Laman and Lemuel, are not able to see the joy. Not able to have a desire to experience it in the Lord's way in joy and determination. The desire is not there. The work is seen as too hard, or too painful, or too whatever to keep us from taking that leap of faith required to reach out and do more and be more.

I am so greatful to the Lord for His tender mercies upon me and that I am able to have that knowledge opened up to me. It has changed me forever.